A Magical formula to solve worry situations – Three steps which can give peace of mind!
Posted March 2, 2010on:
What is being shared here is not only the idea from Dale Carnegie but I have tried this at various occasions. Believe it or not, this method has worked. Many times it happen that we are worried or afraid by thinking: what if this happens or what if that happens?
We are worried about certain assumptions about future which we create in our minds. Here is a three steps formula to solve such worry situations:
Step one: Ask: What is the worst that can possibly happen?
Step two: Prepare to accept it mentally.
Step three: Then calmly proceed to improve on the worst.
Do you think the above is practical? Appreciate your comments.
Here is a small story from the book in which Dale Carnegie has described to show practical application of the above:
“I was being blackmailed!” this student of Dale Carnegie began. “I didn’t believe it was possible-I didn’t believe it could happen outside of the movies-but I was actually being blackmailed!
What happened was this: the oil company of which I was the head had a number of delivery trucks and a number of drivers. At that time, Government regulations were strictly in
force, and we were rationed on the amount of oil we could deliver to any one of our customers.
I didn’t know it, but it seems that certain of our drivers had been delivering oil short to our regular customers, and then reselling the surplus to customers of their own. “The first inkling I had of these illegitimate transactions was when a man who claimed to be a government inspector came to see me one day and demanded hush money. He had got documentary proof of what our drivers had been doing, and he threatened to turn this proof over to the District Attorney’s office if I didn’t cough up.
“I knew, of course, that I had nothing to worry about-personally, at least. But I also knew that the law says a firm is responsible for the actions of its employees. What’s more, I knew that if the case came to court, and it was aired in the newspapers, the bad publicity would ruin my business. And I was proud of my business-it had been founded by my father twenty-four years before. “I was so worried I was sick! I didn’t eat or sleep for three days and nights. I kept going around in crazy circles. Should I pay the money-five thousand dollars-or should I tell this man to go ahead and do his damnedest? Either way I tried to make up my mind, it ended in nightmare.
“Then, on Sunday night, I happened to pick up the booklet on How to Stop Worrying which I had been given in my Carnegie class in public speaking. I started to read it, and came across the story of Willis H. Carrier. ‘Face the worst’, it said. So I asked myself: ‘What is the worst that can happen if I refuse to pay up, and these blackmailers turn their records over to the District Attorney?’
“The answer to that was: My business will ruin – that is the worst that can happen. I can’t go to jail. All that can happen is that I shall be ruined by the publicity.’
“I then said to myself: ‘All right, the business is ruined. I accept that mentally. What happens next?’
“Well, with my business ruined, I would probably have to look for a job. That wasn’t bad. I knew a lot about oil- there were several firms that might be glad to employ me. … I
began to feel better. The blue funk I had been in for three days and nights began to lift a little. My emotions calmed down. … And to my astonishment, I was able to think.
“I was clear-headed enough now to face Step III-improve on the worst. As I thought of solutions, an entirely new angle presented itself to me. If I told my attorney the whole situation, he might find a way out which I hadn’t thought of. I know it sounds stupid to say that this hadn’t even occurred to me before-but of course I hadn’t been thinking, I had only been worrying! I immediately made up my mind that I would see my attorney first thing in the morning-and then I went to bed and slept like a log!
“How did it end? Well, the next morning my lawyer told me to go and see the District Attorney and tell him the truth. I did precisely that. When I finished I was astonished to hear the District Attorney say that this blackmail racket had been going on for months and that the man who claimed to be a ‘government agent’ was a crook wanted by the police. What a relief to hear all this after I had tormented myself for three days and nights wondering whether I should hand over five thousand dollars to this professional swindler!
Have you ever applied the above?